Sunday, March 5, 2006

The Shadow Play

In Kerala, as I dreamed during the shadow play, I saw Hanuman and he spoke these words to me.

Hanuman said, “Near the end of Sri Rama’s life as I kneeled beside his deathbed, tears like the Ganges pouring from my eyes, a ring slipped from the king’s finger and rolled to the floor. Where the ring rested, a tiny hole opened in the Earth and swallowed it up and the ring disappeared from my sight. Sri Rama said to me, ‘Hanuman, you are my ancient friend and my faithful servant. Please will you find my ring?’

“I said, ‘The Earth has taken it; I will find it and return to you.’ At once I shrank down and slipped through the tiny hole in the ground in which the ring had disappeared. For ages I fell but when I reached the end of the world I found myself in a deep cavern poorly lit which was the throne room of the King of Ghosts.

“That king was terrible to see, more terrible than Kumbhakarna, or Indrajit, or Ravana enraged. For the first time in my life I trembled. From the darkness he emerged, gigantic, yet barely discernable. I saw only his eyes and his teeth as he spoke. The rest was blackness.

“The King of Ghosts said to me, ‘You are in my domain and you are in my possession. Whatsoever has passed away comes eventually to me, for I am the keeper of all memories. They are like flowers robbed of sunlight; I watch them fade, wither, and vanish into dust.’

“I said, ‘I am in Rama’s service and you not permitted to detain me. You, like all devas and rakshasas, like all men and monkeys, all creatures in the earth living, dead, and yet to be born, are in his service.’

“I made out in the dim light that the King of Ghosts pressed his palms together in homage. He said, ‘What command does he bring me? I will fulfill it, though I am among the least of his servants.’

“I said, ‘I have come to find his ring. It slipped from his hand and fell here, into this cavern.’

“At once, the King of Ghosts brought before me a great golden tray covered with unnumbered rings. They were all nearly identical, and I sifted through them with my hands. I said, ‘I can’t tell if any of these are Rama’s, or even if they all are.’

“The King of Ghosts said, ‘Whenever an incarnation of Mahavishnu is about to ascend into heaven, his ring falls here. These are all his, and yet not any one is his. When you return to Rama, you will not find him waiting. But keep searching as he commanded you.’

“My heart was broken and I said, ‘How can I search when now it's too late? I failed to find his ring as he commanded me and now I have lost him as well. What will I do?’

“The King of Ghosts said no more, and I returned to the king’s room. Vasishta, the king’s priest, saw me and he said, ‘Rama has ascended and is again with God.’ But my mouth would not open and I bathed Rama's sandals with my tears.

“I left the kingdom and lived a long time in the forests, chanting Rama’s name, hiding myself from people. I wandered for ages, again as though falling into darkness, meditating upon my failure to fulfill Rama’s final command to me.

“One day I came to the forest of Vrndivana and saw Krsna braiding Radha’s hair by a gentle river. I turned toward them, but Krsna approached me without delay and embraced me, as though recognizing me. He smiled and said, ‘O Hanuman, my ancient friend, my faithful servant.’ At the sound of his voice, I could barely speak. I fell to his feet and, clasping them, wept without shame. Krsna lifted me up, embracing me again and laughing joyously. ‘Why are you crying? Don’t you see? You have found the ring at last, the ring I told you to seek.’

“At that moment, I was in paradise.”

When Hanuman finished speaking, he opened his chest with his monkey’s hands and he revealed to me what he enshrined in his heart.

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